Louise's Utopia: Autumn Equinox 2024 And Dreadful Time

We Find ourselves about two weeks and two days from the Autumn Equinox. The brutal and shocking reminder of how fast time seems to be rolling onward. On Sunday, Sept. 22, 2024 the night will be equal to the day. Sounds scary. Twelve hours of darkness and twelve hours of light. Summer will bow it's head to the Autumn. The leaves will change and begin their plummet, its over. The wind will shift from the west and begin its rant from the north. The cold air will roll onto the Coteau. Drying the earth and turning it cold, alone and dark. Already the winds have picked up and strengthened. The past twenty four hours the winds have roared from the west. Here on the Sisseton Hills, I shuttered. It was not just wind gusts of twenty-five mph as forecasted. Rather, it was a constant strong wind of twenty-five mph, plus. The screen door of my house nearly ripped off the hinges in that wind.  I watched the apple in the picture above hold on for it's life as it swayed back and forth in the wind. From the corner of my eye I could see the maples turning their bright orange-yellow. I clung to the door trying to keep standing. The lovely maple leaves, like myself, were being battered, relentlessly by the wind. I felt the sickening sting of time. Pessimistic time, he that is dead-set on passing. Time will not wait for anyone, as he drums forward. I am not ready for the uncomfortable autumn weather that already stirs my soul. Nor, do I want to face the cold, lonely winter. Not this year. Not so soon. It almost seems like the winds have brought with them dread in my heart. Facing another year gone past of so many lost opportunities. The wind seems to knowingly blow in my face like the harsh reality of my defeats. I was outside only a few weeks ago. It was then I realized that it was going to be a cold winter. Cold and snowy. I can feel it in my heart. The winter with its horrible, violent beauty is already taunting me. It calls at me, I'm coming. I would run away, but where would I go? I don't really belong here or there. I only can wait. I sit and think about how I will deal with the frozen, exotic Coteau. Hoping it is just a dream. I keep hoping spring is here, fresh and new and the sky is blue with color. But then the wind picks up again. Blowing still. It's not a dream.